Well, I haven’t written on here in a while, but for some reason I feel motivated to do it right now. Most likely that motivation stems from the fact that I am currently studying for the GRE, which I will only pass by the sheer grace of God. Plus, writing on this seems like a better option that setting my GRE workbook on fire or letting my dogs rip it to sheds.
But anyway, it feels good to be writing right now. I have nothing in particular to say, but I do have a lot running through my mind. I’ve been a little restless lately, which is how I always get when things are about to change. It always surprises me that I feel restlessness though because the changes that are coming are positive ones. There’s just that little twinge of frustration that sets in right before a big adjustment that sort of makes my mind start racing. I want to be settled, moved into my own space, get in my own routine, do all the things I had the freedom to do a few months ago before I graduated from college. I knew life after college would be different and I had no doubt that living back at home would start getting old sooner or later. Those things I expected.
What I didn’t expect was this search to start, but I probably should have. Like my dad always says “We never fully arrive” and what he means by that is that life is always a climb (Miley Cyrus song anyone?). Just when we think we’ve made it, there’s somewhere else to go and that is in no way a negative thing. I’m actually really encouraged by the fact that we don’t arrive here because it kind of helps me shed this sense of judgment I’ve carried and realize that everything I am doing is teaching me something about God and His truth. It’s not an excuse to live recklessly, but it is an invitation to abandon what I thought I knew of God and find Him in the process. To build the kind of relationship with my Savior that I’ve been missing. One of authenticity, hope, and freedom.
